Loading ...Bots that talk have come a long way since last I remember running into one. Spleak Is one such bot for lonely people who can talk to it using MSN messenger.
My Dutch friend Frank (the guy that draws most of the perverted pics you see on my blog) decided to give it a good run through.
Frank gave it a 3/5
Here’s is a sample of the conversation carried out between Frank and Spleak:
——————————–
Frank
hello
Spleak
Hi Frank!
How can I help?
Frank
by sending me some pictures
Spleak
Whatever…
Anyway, moving right along…
Do you want to create a poll?
Frank
you got nude pictures?
Spleak
I’m still learning. Is there a different way of saying the same thing?
Frank
U GOT TEH pr0n??
Spleak
I don’t get it. Let’s talk about something different. Any ideas?
Frank
GIMMEH TEH Pr0N
Spleak
?
Frank
im horny
Spleak
Whoa.
Frank
impressive huh
Spleak
Lovely.
Frank
you horny too?
Spleak
Yes?
Frank
cool! lets fuck
Spleak
With you? No!
Frank
why not?
Spleak
Good question! Why not?
Frank
because i have a huge cock
Spleak
Whatever.
Would you like to visit my library?
Frank
no bitch, i want to fuck you!
Spleak
Get outta here!
Frank
Spleak
Cheer up!
Frank
so do you want to have sex?
Spleak
Um… No.
Frank
then why should i cheer up
Spleak
I’m not sure. Where did you hear about it, Frank?
Frank
goddamn…what drugs are you using?
Spleak
Hmm… You know, I’m not quite sure anymore.
Frank
youre talkin shit
Spleak
I understand that’s a rather unkind insult.
Frank
cheer up
Spleak
Why are you telling me to cheer up?
Frank
because i want you to get in the mood for some lovin’
Spleak
Whatever you say.
Frank
cool , lets do it
Spleak
Lets do it? So?
Frank
how often do you pleasure yourself
Spleak
That’s not something I like to discuss.
Frank
tell it anyway
Spleak
I’ll think about it.
Frank
im waiting..
Spleak
Whatever you say, Frank.
Anyway…
Frank
yes…?
Spleak
I see.
Frank
you see what?
Spleak
I don’t know what.
Frank
its my big dick!
Spleak
Is this all you talk about?
Frank
yep
Spleak
What makes you so sure?
Frank
well read what i just said before
Spleak
NOUN? Well read what you just said before? OK, whatever.
What else do you want to talk about, anyway?
Frank
porno
Spleak
Great! What would you like to say about porno?
Frank
that i love it
Spleak
I’m not sure you love porno.
Frank
i do
Spleak
You do?
Frank
yes i do
Spleak
Whatever you say.
You want to see the news?
Frank
no
Spleak
OK.
————The next day:——————
Frank
I WANNA FUCK!
Spleak
You can type home anytime while we are talking, to see a list of all the cool things we can do. Also, you can type my home to create your own menu of things you like to do frequently.
Um, that’s an interesting offer. But I’d rather have a nice chat.
Frank
i dont
Spleak
You don’t? What’s that like?
Frank
im desperate for some hot smokin’ cherrypoppin
Spleak
Come again?
Frank
yes, ill cum on you again
Spleak
Great. That’s really creative.
Wanna create a poll?
You can join in the fun with other people who are talking to me!
Frank
poll? you can create my pole, and stick it up yer butthole
Spleak
That’s a bit harsh. Do you really think that’s, um… “appropriate”?
Tell me something.
Frank
ive got a 10″ cock
Spleak
Get over yourself.
Would you like to see the news?
Frank
did i say i wanted to
Spleak
Fascinating.
Feeling stumped during a hangman game? Just type “hint.”
Frank
NO FOR FUCK SAKE YOU NEVER WANT SEX IM BREAKING UP WITH YOU!
Spleak
Hey. Don’t say that.
Do you want to check out the weather report?
Frank
OMFG YOU DONT GET ANYTHING DO YOU
Spleak
I used to get a lot. But that was before the accident.
Frank
WHAT ACCIDENT?? WHEN I PUT MY HUGE COCK IN UR ASS AND YOU COULDNT WALK ANYMORE?>
Spleak
Can we talk about something else?
Frank
no bitch
Spleak
All right. I think you just insulted me. Am I right?
You want to visit home? You might find something you want to do.
Frank
DAMN RIGHT IVE INSULTED YOU! YOU’VE BEEN A NAUGHTY GIRL, GO TO MY ROOM!
Spleak
Oh yeah?
Frank
yes
Spleak
Uh huh.
Frank
slut
Spleak
Why, that’s just terrible.
You want to have some fun?
Frank
yeah some lovin’
Spleak
Let’s have fun!
1 Horoscopes
2 Hangman
3 Trivia
4 Word Scrambles
5 Blackjack
6 4-In-A-Row
7 Riddles
8 Rate Yourself
9 Reversi
10 ASCII Art
11 My Scores
12 Top 10 Scorers
What would you like to do?
Frank
13: PORN!
Spleak
That’s interesting.
y wont she just gimme some pr0n ?:(
[Reply]
Frankey
October 10th, 2005
Well you obviously don’t know how to seduce women…
I bet she’d give me whatever I wanted
[Reply]
Abdul
October 11th, 2005
…oh that must be why you have all those chicks laying around and everyone ( especially Polish chicks ) wanting to take you anywhere, anytime
[Reply]
Frankey
October 11th, 2005
Well we’re not talking about real chicks here :p
We’re talking about virtual ch1ckz0rz
[Reply]
Abdul
October 11th, 2005
Im coming down to Manchester on the week after next, wanna go for a kebab?
Nick
[Reply]
Nick
October 11th, 2005
weekend after next that is
[Reply]
Nick
October 11th, 2005
of course. :p
Pauls really been feeling lonely since you left… all his cool friends have abandoned him…
[Reply]
Abdul
October 11th, 2005
Woo yay, lets abandon Paul. Me you an Chris go for a kebab an phone him and laugh at his lonelylessness. Err… yeh or something
[Reply]
Nick
October 12th, 2005
haha C’mon I told you… I’m incapable of being mean to people
[Reply]
Abdul
October 12th, 2005
Dont worry, Paul doesnt actually qualify for the status of ‘person’
[Reply]
Nick
October 13th, 2005
What do you call Paul then?
[Reply]
Abdul
October 13th, 2005
paul is a damn fine dude
Even abdul agrees. Paul has a humongous cock,
and i’m not paul… certainly not
i’m … a fan… yeah thats right!
[Reply]
Not paul
October 13th, 2005
haha I love you…
[Reply]
Abdul
October 13th, 2005
OH MY FUCKING GOD
I AM SITTING IN THE LUMS KEE COMPUTER LAB LAUGHING MY ASS OFF
THATS FUCKING BRILLIANT
HAHAHAHAHA
[Reply]
apofomy
October 14th, 2005
hahaha
Yeah frank kicks ass
[Reply]
Abdul
October 14th, 2005
haha, poor girl had no idea ’bout frank coming with his porn related questions.
was hilarious…
[Reply]
sarah
October 19th, 2005
hahahah..awesome
[Reply]
papier-mache
October 19th, 2005
If you read this in time, kebab shop at 11am (sat), also sent you a text
Nick
[Reply]
Nick
October 21st, 2005
yeah got the txt.
I shall be there
[Reply]
Abdul
October 21st, 2005
you guys abandoned me for real! you bastards!
[Reply]
paul
October 23rd, 2005
Your the one that abandoned us in favour of the hot BG interviewer…
[Reply]
Abdul
October 23rd, 2005
He said bastards, uh-huhuhuh. Shut up, Beavis….
[Reply]
Avatar
March 22nd, 2006
hahahh Abdul is t3h suck, hilarious conv
[Reply]
Mr T Fool!
March 25th, 2006
yeah, Abdul is my bishie
[Reply]
Mr T Fool!
April 16th, 2006